Thecia Jenkins

“Do what you feel in your heart to be right, for you’ll be criticized anyway.”

–Eleanor Roosevelt

So you finally got the promotion, congratulations!  You have put in the time, invested financially into your professional development and have proven yourself to be valuable to your organization as a leader.

However, the shininess of the new position is starting to dull.  What happened, you have now realized that all that glitters is not gold.  Leadership is a wonderful position to be in; it is not always the popular position to be in unfortunately.

Keep moving ahead and here are three truths to encourage you on your journey as you work with your team to meet the organizational mission and make a profit:

Truth #1 – There will always be that one person who does not agree with you.  It’s okay, do take the time to hear them out and be willing to weigh their input.  If their point of view proves to be more effective by all means give them the credit, adapt your plans and move forward.  It is not personal, it is business.  On the other hand, if their point of view is not best for the overall goals of the company be willing to explain once and thank them for their input.

Truth #2 – You will have to make decisions whether popular or unpopular.  Self-confidence is key for leadership, you are constantly being called upon to make decisions and sometimes with little or no warning beforehand.  Become comfortable with making decisions and trusting your instincts, past situations and seeing yourself as an expert.

Truth #3 – The more confident and competent you become in your role as a leader your circle will become smaller.  It’s not that you will become “better than” others; it is a matter of you becoming better than the person you were when you first start your leadership journey.  You are growing, constantly investing in yourself and taking on challenges that many times others shrink away from.  You are being stretched and eventually you outgrow people, places and things that once were comfortable.  Give yourself permission to reach out to new circles, find mentors who are where you desire to be and most importantly make yourself available to be a mentor or sponsor for those coming behind you.

Remember to maintain a sense of independence, the ability to self-directed and self-controlled in your thinking and actions and to be free of emotional dependency.  Leaders go against the grain when others go with the flow, happy leading!

I had the privilege of listening to Dr. T. Berry Brazelton, a world renowned pediatrician, as he shared nuggets of wisdom on creating learning environments for youth from birth to adolescence. I sat in awe as this ninety-four year old young man poured out anecdotal strategies to engage infants, toddlers and school agers. His presence and ability to engage an audience that was thirty to fifty years younger than him was a testament that continued education and lifelong learning is the key to adaptability in a changing workforce, maintaining a sharp mind and longevity of purpose. During Dr. Brazelton’s presentation his assistant who was about fifty years younger commented that Dr. Brazelton is a hard act to follow because of his “youthfulness” which he attributed to his insatiable desire to continue learning new things and teaching others. That’s who I want to be!

Have you considered who and where you will be in the next ten, twenty or thirty years? Will you continue to be a contributor in your chosen field of expertise, will you continue to be a trendsetter, a go to person or will you become a liability, nuisance and an artifact of the good ole days.

Over the next month, take the challenge to develop and maintain a love for lifelong learning and professional development.

#1: Commit To Reading – According to the Associated Press in 2007 only one in four adults read a book that year. Most individuals stop reading once they have achieved their high school diploma or degree.  The accomplishment of a diploma or degree is just the beginning, continue reading books and articles in your chosen career. Benefits of reading include increased vocabulary and earning potential. The National Center for Education Statistics in 2003 reported that adults with low language literacy were three times more likely to live below the poverty level, our children learn by example so our commitment to reading becomes a legacy for them.

#2: Take or Teach a Class – Invest in yourself by taking classes or seminar throughout the year that enhance your career or business; and also enrichment classes that broaden your horizons. You also can challenge yourself by sharing your knowledge as an instructor; develop a curriculum or program and pitch it to your local association, ministry or college. Teaching is a great vehicle to increase your knowledge and others.

#3: Step outside your comfort zone and develop a relationship with someone outside your usual circle of associates and friends. This is an opportunity to educate yourself about other cultures such as worshipping outside your faith occasionally or becoming involved in other organizations outside your culture. For example, I served for two years on the Asians Against Domestic Abuse board of directors, it was an excellent experience and insight into a culture and its people.

Take the challenge this month and expand your educational opportunities; and then make it habit to adapt to the ever changing workforce, nurture a sharp mind and walk in purpose.  Learning to learn is non-negotiable!

“I haven’t failed.  I’ve identified 10,000 ways this doesn’t work.” ~  Thomas Edison

A little boy who did not speak until he was four years old or read until he was seven, a high school basketball player who was cut from the team, an artist that sold only one painting to a friend and yet completed eight hundred pieces of art; and a senior citizen who was angry that his social security check was only $105.00 set out to become an entrepreneur at sixty-five.  What do these individuals have in common?  They possess the emotional competency of optimism, the ability to pursue goals despite obstacles and setbacks.

What have you encountered in the past year?  Perhaps a layoff, a failed relationship, a rejected manuscript or foreclosure.   Well, this year is not over and if you are reading this you are still among the living and that means you can still back on track

The first step to getting back on track is recognizing that the steps you have taken are not taking you to the desired destination.  Persistence is key, however, steadily moving forward in a direction that is not yielding the desired results is insanity.  Be willing to be flexible and adapt to the current circumstances.  Secondly, take stock of your strengths and weaknesses.  Perhaps you are excellent at handling the technical side of your business, but are struggling with the day to day running of the business.  Now might be the time to delegate or hire a virtual assistant or bring on an intern to free you to pursue what comes naturally to you.  And finally, recognize that you are not perfect.  You are human and part of the human experience is experiencing setbacks, failures and disappointments that can derail you.  Persistence and optimism will get you back on track.

Now get yourself back on track and walk in your purpose just like Albert Einstein, who was thought to be mentally disabled and went on to be awarded the Noble Prize;  Michael Jordan, who was let go from his high school basketball team and went on to become a basketball legend;  Vincent Van Gogh, one of the greatest artists in history who only sold one piece of art during his lifetime yet completed over 800 pieces of art because he believed in his craft; and  Colonel Sanders of KFC, who was turned down 1009 times when seeking financing for his company.  The world is waiting on you!
###

*Elaine is a professional who holds a MBA from one of the top business schools in the country, she speaks two languages and is meticulous in her work. However, today she was passed over for promotion for the third time in the last eighteen months. As she drives home she clinches her steering wheel and unleashes a trail of obscenities through tears as she tries to make sense of why her supervisor would say “your inability to work effectively with peers continues to be an issue.”

Technical competencies play an integral role in climbing the proverbial corporate ladder or expanding your business. However, according to Daniel Goleman a Harvard psychologist, it is our ability to manage our emotions that will ultimately determine our success in the workplace and ability to deliver on the financial bottom line. Emotional Intelligence the ability to manage our emotions and identify the emotions of others is a soft skill that empowers you to address the hard issues in the workplace.

Like Elaine, many individuals have stellar technical skills while their ability to recognize their anxiety level, express their thoughts in a non-confrontational manner, identify the strengths of team members or experience empathy in the workplace are non-existent. These may seem unimportant, but the reality is that many a deal has been loss in corporate America because an individual was not made to feel important or felt that their needs were not being met by the representative of the company negotiating with them.

Here are some strategies to win in the business zone by developing your emotional intelligence:

Have you ever been in a meeting and suddenly found yourself frowning, tapping your fingers or making a comment and then wishing you had rephrased your words? Chances are someone or something triggered an emotion in you. Self-awareness is key in moving forward in both personal and professional relationships. Take time to know what pushes your emotional triggers before you are front and center in a business meeting or professional setting. Practice on your response, ask yourself if the triggered emotion is a real or are you reacting to internal fears.

Talk Back To Yourself: When irrational thoughts or fears taunt you regarding your abilities or the comments and actions of others take over your thoughts; talk back to yourself. Tell yourself that you are skilled and also be willing to process the comments of others to see if there is any validity in their observations. Take that information process and then coach yourself to use the information to enhance your performance. Remind yourself that you are good at what you do and that you are willing to learn from every interaction you have in the course of your day. Also tell yourself that there is no failure only feedback.

Become A Tourist In Your Company: Take some time on a daily or weekly basis to visit with staff or departments within your company to see people at work in their element. Ask yourself and them what is important about their work, what are their daily triumphs and struggles; what excites them about their role. Being effective with people means learning about what motivates and demotivates them and developing trust. Take time to know your team and what is important to them and allow them to know what is important to you.

Be Willing To Have Crucial Conversations: When you know yourself and know your triggers, are able to rationalize your irrational thoughts and have established relationships with your team the next step is willingness to engage in crucial conversations versus letting issues go unresolved in the workplace. Set a time to meet with your colleague or subordinate, agree to disagree, allow the other person to give their point of view without interruption, next give your point of view and then attempt to find common ground and agree to work collaboratively on the outcome together as a team. The most important part of the conversation is learning to hear each other out and to respect each other’s diverse point of view and ultimately what is best for the bottom line of the business.

Start today working on your soft skills and addressing the hard issues in the workplace that will result in bottom line results and put you in the zone for expanded business.

Do you find yourself feeling overwhelmed?  Are you overcommitted?  Have you experienced feeling resentful about how you are spending your time?  These  may be signs that you are not living intentionally and setting healthy boundaries in both your personal and professional life.

Intentional is to be on purpose.  How often are you being purposeful in moving towards your goals; taking care of yourself and setting boundaries regarding your time and talents.  This can be a daunting challenge to be assertive in saying no, especially to opportunities to network and collaborate.

Take the challenge and speak up!  Be bold and intentional in achieving the goals that you are setting yourself; it is not selfish to protect your time and talents.  Yes, it is true when you help others achieve their goals you too achieve; however, everything must have a balance.  Set your boundary and get on course with the goals you have set; it’s okay to say no.  Bold professionals know when to be intentionally focused and set boundaries.